I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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