Where are you?
In a non slutty way
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize