OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
