So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
