I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
