At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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