He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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