well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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