I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
if you like me you must not know who I am
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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