Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
