It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize