I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
