That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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