some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
