okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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