I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
