Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
