It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Randomize
