people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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