woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize