Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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