ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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