I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
