I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
