new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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