Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Holy shit dude........stairs
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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