It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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