I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize