I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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