I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize