Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
