scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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