Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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