New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
