Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
