watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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