i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
