You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize