I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Randomize
