they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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