STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Randomize
