her vagine was all disorganized.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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