You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
