is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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