if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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