I hope mine doesn't look like that
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
