I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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