Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
