Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
