Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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