Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
it glows. i had to have it.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
